This is a story about me and my birth, life and whatever else my brain parts have decided you need to know.
I
spent almost a full year trapped in a prison before the dragon people
decided that I could leave. (Whatever, just imprison whoever you feel
like dragons, it's not like we care...) Then I was unleashed upon the
world. This mostly included me running shit. When I was smaller
than I am now, I was kind of a boss. "Oh, I'm sorry did you not want
to do what I said?" Then you get bit. That's how this is gonna get
played. Then everyone was all like "stop biting me, and calling me a
clay-boy. I'm a regular human thing and blah blah blah". Whatever most
importantly I had to stop being a boss, because biting people seems to
stop being an appropriate punishment after 6.
So then
there was a time when I was some kind of sub-human. Regular humans call
it "puberty" but I'm pretty sure the mutant form I took during that
time does not even have a real name, maybe blurgoblobbymeanface? That
seems to fit better. Anyway, nothing important happened there. Unless
you include a parallel timeline that had to be destroyed so ours could
live, which I don't.
Then I became a grown tiny human,
and all the creature people were like "Congrats!! We never thought you'd
make it past 15." and "Wow, sometimes your face looks like a worm." and
"Today is a special day because it's Friday and TGIF, am I right?"
In
summary, pineapples are not apples in the shape of pine trees and I
like spiders. I'm not going to pretend otherwise anymore. Also I'm
just going to say what everyone is thinking, squirrels are
disease-ridden meth addicts looking to destroy everything.
Something inspirational,
Tiny Human
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